Sometimes, I feel like a circus performer. I wonder how in the world I ever got all those brightly colored balls up in the air in the first place, and I worry that I will not be able to keep up my juggling act. Picture a girl on a tightrope.
What would happen if I dropped those balls?
I have come to realize that I am so overwhelmingly busy because I taught myself to be: in high school, I threw myself into sports, theater, school, and chorus in an attempt to be away from my father. I'll be 27 in a week, and the art of being busy that I struggled to learn for survival has now become the thing that I must survive.
I know I've got too much going on, but so much of it is beautiful and joyous. How do I drop some balls without losing them all? Or should I just jump off the tightrope, change my costume, and find something more stationary, something less thrilling to do?
It seems like I haven't been home all week...and it looks like this pace will continue for at least another month.
This wouldn't be a concern (other than for my stress levels) except for the fact that I haven't written in five days. Five days! That's more than just "I need a day off"...that's the start of a slump.
And I am bursting to write. I simply don't have enough hours in the day. So I must keep juggling, working for the place when I can set the balls down and step out of the spotlight and back behind my desk.
What do you struggle with?